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Why YOU Are the Most Important Person You Need to Understand

biz momagement cliftonstrengths disc enneagram human design journal love languages planner self development time momagement Sep 20, 2022
Marisa Lonic

There was a time I thought getting to know other people well would help me best relate to them in our relationships: significant other, kids, friends, extended family, colleagues-you name it. If I could understand them, I'd know how to react when they needed my opinion or advice, how to approach them when I needed a favor, how to empathize when they needed emotional support.  

Not only is this approach exhausting, (I mean, seriously, is anyone even capable of learning the inner workings of everyone they know and interact with?), it's also missing a BIG element, a pre-requisite so to speak. 

And that pre-requisite is...YOU.

You are the MOST IMPORTANT and NECESSARY person you need to spend time getting to know before you can show up for all those people in the best way possible. 

Want to know the 3 best ways to do this without having to sit in silent discomfort and stare at yourself in a mirror, analyzing every pore you see? Here they are:

1. Take a self assessment. There are tons of great assessments out there that will teach you about your personality, communication style, and even the way you show love and appreciation for others. The better you can understand where you naturally default to, the easier it will be for you to identify those around you and streamline your style, communication and appreciation for them in a way that maximizes efficiency and clearly delivers your message and intent. Here are a few you can easily google and take (many for free) right now: 



VIA Character Strengths Survey

Love Languages


Speaking of the Enneagram, be sure to check out this podcast episode with Tess O'Driscoll (aka The Enneagram Mom) for more good stuff on topic!

Anddd....your girl (hi--it me, Marisa, I'm your girl) also has some incredible self-assessments in my books Time MOMagement and Biz MOMagement like discovering your communication style (mom edition) and determining your worthiness to ensure mom guilt isn't sabotaging your ability to MOMage your time and biz #likeaboss. 

2. Learn your human design. A few years ago I had no idea what human design even was and now I think about this concept daily, in how I show up in business, in parenting, in my relationship, in life. Human design is based on your birth time and location (similar to astrology) and helps you understand how you're wired essentially in order to feel most aligned, make good decisions you feel comfortable with and not pressured into, and interact with others in a way that feels authentic and true to you. Check out this site to learn what your human design is. P.S. I'm a Projector! 

3. Journal, meditate or practice breathwork daily. It's amazing how many downloads and nuances you will notice about yourself when you actually give yourself the space to notice them. Most people, including my past self, don't give themselves time to practice something like this on the regular, if at all. When I started creating a regular habit to journal, meditate or practice breathwork, I started seeing patterns: patterns in the way I was feeling, thinking, behaving. I started seeing intuitive signs that would continuously show up. I started allowing these parts of me to be seen, heard, and consequently allowed them to holistically make up who I am, rather than subconsciously suppress them. Suppressing anything is never a good thing. Not a journaler? Try giving Word to Your Mother: A Mama's Guide to Journal Today & Slay Tomorrow a chance. It's been called "the journal for non-journalers", takes no more than 15 minutes daily, and serves a dual purpose of reflecting and taking action. And, if you've never heard of breathwork before, listen to this podcast episode where you can try it out with the amazing Stevie Wright

When you get intentional about how you are spending your time and with who you're spending it with, magical things can happen. Spend some time today getting to know this incredibly important person in your life: YOU. It's truly amazing how much you can accomplish, what an impact you can have, and who you can attract by simply knowing who YOU are first. 

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